Eulogy for Billy D. Fritts

Six years I stood in this spot and talked about my Mama and four weeks ago I read a poem for my Grandma – I truly did not expect to be standing here again so soon. I thank you all for being here to remember my Daddy – DADDY – it really is a funny sounding word – but its meaning is one everyone who has a good one understands. The saying “anyone can be a father but it takes someone very special to be a Daddy” is certainly true. In particular, it is true of my Daddy. Not long after I turned 13, he said I was too old to call Mom “Mommy”, but not once in my entire life did he say I was too old to call him Daddy. I have lost the two people here on earth that loved me the most – it is a strange feeling.
Billy and Raenell were a team and some might think it is strange for me to speak of my Mom on the day we are honoring my Dad, but it is not to me. I would not be here if it were not for each one of them. My mama understood my Daddy in a way that no one else ever did – including me. On the morning Mom stepped into heaven, Daddy and I bonded in a new way and I began to learn a lot more about him. I am quite sure that most of you did not really know anything about where my Daddy came from or how he came to be here so I wanted to share the story of his life with you.
Billy Fritts was third born out of six children – three boys and three girls in Eldorado, Illinois, a small farming community – on September 8, 1935. Sadly two of the girls would pass away as infants. His twin brothers were born when he was nine years old. So for the first nine years, it was just Dad and Aunt Liz and and they were extremely close. Dad’s parents divorced before Dad was a teen and his father moved to Detroit and Dad never saw him again and he died shortly after I was born. His paternal grandparents were divorced as well, and his paternal grandfather never met his grandchildren. Even though Dad’s maternal grandparents were also divorced they maintained a good relationshop. Dad’s maternal grandfather, Grandpa Sam, was a huge influence on Dad. When Dad was 7, my grandmother moved them all to Evansville, Indiana on the Ohio River – a large, bustling, industrial city. When America joined WWII, both my grandmother and great grandmother worked as “Rosie the Riveters”. Life was tough. They basically lived in an apartment in a tenement house. Even though it was the city – the only heat came from the wood burning stove in the kitchen. There was not much money. Dad told me about rats the size of cats that they would trap in the apartment and how the wind whistled through the windows. Dad got his first job at 12 stocking groceries. At 14, his Mom co-signed for him to buy a bike in installments. He loved that bike!!! He delivered newspapers from 14 to 17. But he made time for fun, too. He loved baseball. One of his friends had a transistor radio and they would ride down to the ball field for minor league games and listen to the game on that transistor radio right outside the stadium-he always preferred to listen to games rather than watch them. He played around the river docks and watched men work on naval ships in the shipyard and he loved to swim in a large concrete pond. He also loved the movies, his family and a group of friends that he would stay in touch with for the rest of his life. As a matter of fact, he enjoyed movies so much that when I was born, he named me Frances Denise – Frances for his grandmother and Denise for a French actress, Denise Darcell, whom he had seen in a movie. Dad left school at 15 and worked full time at the jean factory, still delivering papers before work. At 17, he asked his mother to sign for him to join the Navy, which she did. I asked Dad why he chose the Navy. He told me that his best friend wanted to join the Navy and he wanted to join the Army and as they walked together to the recruiting station – they each changed their minds!
The Navy became Dad’s second family. This why you heard the Navy theme earlier – he has pulled up his anchor and headed out to sea. He excelled in the ordered lifestyle and quickly adapted the military regimented style to his personal life. The structure suited him to a “T”. In 1954, he was introduced to a spunky redhead from Lowell, GA. They wrote to each other for four years – in late August of 1958 he traveled to Lowell from Memphis, Tennessee, and met the petite redhead’s family and within 24 hours proposed with a ring made from a one dollar bill. He left for Indiana to tell his family and purchase a proper ring. He returned one week later with an engagement ring and wedding band and Billy Dale Fritts married Raenell Williamson on September 7, 1958. I added that wedding band to my own when I married in 2011. Three months after they married, Mom discovered she was pregnant with me and Dad got orders for Okinawa. It was quite the change for a newlywed couple who had only been around each other for a few months. Daddy crossed the Pacific and Mom returned home to Lowell to wait for me. Daddy’s orders to Okinawa would place him with a group of people that would remain his friends for the rest of his life. The squadron was known as Patrol Squadron 4 or VP-4, the Neptune Squadron. VP-4 was created in 1928 and was originally based at Pearl Harbor. The squadron over time was absorbed into other Naval wings as designations changed and regaining it’s name of VP-4 in September of 1948 and worked first in the seas off Alaska and then Korea, Hawaii and Guam – eventually heading back to Whidbey Island. In 1956 the squadron was based at Naha NAS in Okinawa. Their job was submarine detection from what was then called the “Communist Threat” in the waters off southeast Asia. The Neptune Squadron were highly decorated during Dad’s time with them – an illustrious career that has continued through to the Skinny Dragons of today as they are now designated. This was Dad’s proudest time in his 20 year service in the military. From Okinawa we moved on to Key West. As Vietnam heated up – Dad decided he wanted to be a civilian – which lasted less than a year. The Air Force came knocking – desperate for mechanics. You will hear the Air Force theme later because the words are also fitting – off he goes into the wild blue yonder. They offered to bring Dad in at his last rank and to keep him stateside – I should insert an LOL here. As those of you who have served know – the military does not always recognize their earlier statements. Daddy said they put your name on a dart, handed it to a blindfolded man and turn him toward a map of the world. We shipped off to North Carolina and in less than a year, my mother’s greatest fear was realized. Vietnam was in the future for Dad. The letters home were about puppies and children and thanks for cookies and love for us. To this day, Dad has not spoken much about that experience. The photos from that time are kept separate from the rest of his mementos. We did learn that the barracks next to his was blown up and he lost many friends. But he came home. The day he left and the day he returned are etched in my memory forever. Next stop – Warner Robins!! A stroke of luck put us back in Mom’s home state and close to family. But again, that would not last long. Clark AFB in the Philippines was the next port of call – off Daddy went, leaving Mom newly pregnant with my sister. This time he did not go alone –his beloved ’66 Mustang traveled by ship from New Orleans to Clark. Eight months later – Mom and I arrived and three days later Christy was born. It was a somewhat easy delivery despite the earthquake that rocked the hospital. I was SO excited when he got home! He would not tell me if the baby was a boy or girl – he kept saying it was kittens, then puppies. Finally he said I had a sister and I got to pick her middle name!! I chose “Dale”, Daddy’s middle name which I had always loved. It was not until I was an adult that Mom told me a now humorous story. Dad stayed with Mom as long as they would allow in those days. As soon as Christy was safely born and he checked on Mom – he immediately walked down the hall and demanded the operation that would make sure there would be no more babies! No way, no how was he putting Mom through that AGAIN. This story is funny and cute but tells a lot about Dad which would become more evident later on in my life. Daddy’s orders sent us from the PI to North Dakota and back to the PI (but without us this time). The conflict in Vietnam was coming to an end – Nixon was pulling the troops out. In a desperate attempt to save the Amerasian children born to Vietnamese women, American wives of officers traveled to Saigon to begin the evacuation of the children. History tells us the first plane load crashed, but many others made it to the Philippines. GI’s stationed there each cared for a child. Dad fell in love with a very young girl in his charge who constantly asked for chocolate and could play poker. There was a brief moment that this young girl almost became my second sister. But she already had a family waiting for her. I know Dad always wondered about what happened to her. Dad’s last assignment was completed at Maxwell Air Force Base in Montgomery, Alabama. Now we could begin to live as a family in one house all together. That sounds so simple – but it was not. We all had to get used to being together all the time – I think it was easiest for Christy since she was turning 6 and I was turning 17.
Life moved on – Dad went to work at Southwire and he treated that job as if he was still in the military – exacting, professional, regimented, dedicated. One of his supervisors told me Dad was the cleanest machine maintenance man he ever met. He wore coveralls and skipped one of his breaks during the day so that he could clean up 15 minutes before clock out. His coveralls were diligently checked for spots were sprayed with cleaner. Then he would roll then up as neatly as a newspaper roll – take them home and wash them. He cleaned his tools and placed them in a toolbox lined with foam with special cut out places for specific tools. Always one to push for education Daddy had completed the requirements for a high school diploma many years earlier. He began to take college classes at night – driving to Alabama, completing an Associate in Science degree at Southern Union Junior College. My sister and I just found all of his grade slips. One constant in Daddy’s life was that he read at least 2 newpapers a day no matter where we lived. When we returned to Georgia, his standard was the AJC and the local paper – each read cover to cover every single day until about six months ago when cataracts made it almost impossible to read and enjoy. He said a high school teacher told him if he did this that when he was old he would have as much information in his head as a set of Encyclopedias. I do not know if that is true, but he would clip out articles he knew I would find interesting on anything from history to archaeology to dollhouses and old movies! He was always a fount of interesting little tidbits.
When I was 25 I was involved in a very serious car accident. I had to have surgery – what started out as a two hour surgery to put two pins into my left hip morphed into seven hours, two seven inch plates and fourteen pins. My first memory after waking up was Daddy looking down at me and holding my hand. He was crying and his tears were splashing on my cheeks. He said “If I could take this pain for you, I would”. That picture of him and those words are forever written in my heart. This is who he was. He could not stand to see my mother in pain any more than he could his child (not matter how old we got).
Daddy was generous to those in need – quietly and discreetly. Daddy always worked hard for his money and was a saver – but if someone needed it, he gave it without fanfare. He was honest to a fault. Not too long ago, he drove to Don Rich Ford in Villa Rica on a Sunday afternoon to cruise the car lot. He turned too sharp and scraped the concrete base of a light pole. He was wracked with guilt about scraping the paint of the concrete – especially when he went in for an oil change and saw they had repainted it. He hid an enormously tender heart under a tough exterior which gradually mellowed and the teddy bear inside took over. He worried about his grandchildren – sometimes over silly things. When my cat, Katie, died at age 16 and my dog, Sophie, at age 15, he cried right along with me. He loved my mother’s family like his own. Mom’s dad became the dad he never had. He modeled himself after my grandfather’s ethics. His sense of humor was not the same – but grandpa could make him laugh like no other. Grandpa sent Daddy a quail feather while he was in Vietnam – Dad had it incased in plastic and carried it in his wallet until the day of Grandpa’s funeral – he placed it back in Grandpa’s hands with a promise to go quail hunting in heaven.
My Dad was unsure of organized religion. For many years my Mom got up every Sunday and attended church in whatever state or country we were in – calmly setting the example for him. There were very few times in my childhood that Dad would attend. In the 70’s, one Sunday morning, Dad got up with Mom. Quite surprised, she asked him why he was up so early – he said “I think it is time I started to go to church”, and he was baptized not long after. Dad was quiet about it and never really talked about his decision, but I think he realized that the faith of my grandparents and mother were already part of who he had become.
Of course there are a hundred stories about my Dad – enough to fill a book. Stories I will relive and cherish for the rest of my life. We often say that someone was a good person. I can say, without a doubt, that my Daddy was a good, kind, generous, humble man. The largest part of his journey here on earth really ended on December 17, 2010 when Mom took her last breath. He was crushed and he never regained his interest in life but at the same time did not give up completely. Nothing would ever be the same for him. You may have noticed that he was clean shaven – this was his request – because Mama did not like kissing a broom. Now they are together – I am sure when my Daddy got to Heaven, my Mama said the same thing she said after seeing him for the first time after her last surgery, grinning from ear to ear, “Hey Baby”. They are quietly walking around the clouds saying hello to all those who are already there and without a doubt, they are healthy and happy.